THE INNOCENT PLAYBOY

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Asides the general perspective that men are animals who simply chase the goodies in skirts, there are many other reasons why men cheat. For one, happenstance could lead to unplanned coitus! This is my personal experience; an innocent christian man who only had sex with my wife all my life until the day circumstances beyond me drove me to experience the forbidden nonsense. I was driving home after a hectic day at a job I never liked when I began to feel a rather uncomfortable pain in my man sacs. The pain was disorienting, yet I managed to drive home thinking it would eventually fade away. But it nagged me throughout that evening, and I would spend the entire night sleepless while researching the possible causes for my pain. By the next morning however, I knew I had to make an emergency visit my urologist.

Thanks to Google.
Thanks to Google.

As I said, I’m a christian who was very innocent prior to the incident that changed my life. And to forestall likely temptations, I made meticulous efforts to avoid very close relationship with women who were neither my wife, daughters, sisters nor mother. However, when it came to the issue of choosing a urologist, I didn’t find the idea of another man examining my junk comfortable; I went for a woman urologist. Yet in my desperate attempt to be careful, I made sure that the woman in question (Dr. Ebere Charles) was an old, no-nonsense, Jesus-loving churchie kinda woman. My wife liked her very much too! Unfortunately, when I got to her office that unfortunate Thursday morning with my emergency, I was informed by her receptionist that she had an emergency of her own and was not going to be around. I quickly dialed her number, and she told me she was (as a matter of fact) out of town. But she told me not to worry as her granddaughter had just returned from New York where she specialized in urology at one of the finest hospitals in America. She said her granddaughter would take care of me so much so I would be pain-free in no time. Hmmmmm…granddaughter; not even a daughter! Well I agreed, and waited in pain for the granddaughter to come in.

Well it's official; photo is a property of Getty Images...
Well it’s official; photo is a property of Getty Images…

She walked in looking more like a screen diva than a doctor. That sexiness instantly upset my righteous mind. But then the pain in between my legs reminded me that it was time to prioritize what was most important to me- get rid of the pain or maintain my holiness! She smiled at me (gorgeous smile), and told me with her interesting Nigerian/American accent that her grandma informed her about me. As I followed her (like a sheep to the slaughter) into her grandma’s office, she asked me a few questions about the pain. I replied nervously, unsure whether I really wanted that gorgeousness of a woman touching me. But then she seemed professional, very coordinated and with a no-nonsense countenance just like her grandma. I wished that had lasted forever.

“So I’m gonna have to examine you in order to know what exactly the problem is” she said.

“What?” I asked like an idiot. She stared at me as though suddenly confused by my timidity. And then she smiled briefly as she looked away and got gloves on her palms.

“Mr. Obi, I’ve been doing this for a while now. And throughout the times I’ve done it, I’ve seen all kinds of men naked. I’m sure your nakedness is nothing extra special. So you’re gonna have to remove your fancy clothing in order for me to take a look at your scrotum!”

I mean, that was just rude of her to say, right? I stood there eying her angrily for some split seconds while she waited for me to decide. Eventually, I did, and up till now as I write this story I wish I never removed my clothing before that pretty, pretty medical doctor…

Emmanuel A. Benson is an aspiring screenwriter/novelist. Contact him on +2347056043272

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